Mainly, I was in a little depression. Hard to say, as it's soooo not my personality. But, frankly I was miserable! I was feeling sorry for myself and as the holiday's were approaching, just stepping into this house was hard. I would pull up in front of my house in the car and just sit there, no neighbors, an empty cul de sac. I would just sit there, tears streaming down my face, afraid of the unknown, afraid if this was it, afraid if we were going to flood again for a third time. I feared for my children and prayed, and prayed and prayed! I have never prayed as much as I did, and continue to do so. I had a choice, I could get mad at God for what had happened, or deepen my faith. I chose to deepen my faith and rely on him, trusting him and thanking him! I chose to rely on him, meaning that I know that he does not want us to despair, but to live in abundance and to be a blessing to others. I chose to thank him for all the good things in my life, my amazing husband and incredibly resilient children. They were my beacon of hope!
As 2011 closed, I made a decision to be happy! I needed to be for my family, my husband needed his wife back and my children needed their mother back.
The holidays came and it ended up being such a wonderful Christmas. The little ones were soooo cute! It seriously made Frank and I melt! Scottie really was so adorable, he was so grateful for all his presents! Santa brought him this angry birds sweatshirt and hat and the second he opened it, he put it on and didn't take it off until it was time for bed. It was just so precious, all Frank and I could do was smile and laugh. God really does work through his little ones doesn't he. So follow me along for the ride, 2012 is going to be amazing I declare! LOL I can feel it! xoxoxox Dawn
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